Who Is: Corey Feldman

Guys who is Corey Feldman. Here is what I know without researching: he is a child star of the 80s, he looks like a lizard, he was friends with another child star of the 80s also named Corey. I sort of get the feeling he's the human embodiment of washed up, but he's slightly more respected than Joe Simpson. And no, I will not be nice to Joe Simpson just because he was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer.

So who is this guy? He was in The Burbs and Gremlins, but I don't remember caring about his face. I certainly don't recognize it. He was the voice of Donatello in the 90s live action TNMT movie. 

A young Corey Feldman, still doesn't ring a bell

So the other Corey was Corey Haim, they were 80s friends and also had a reality tv show together in the 2007. It was called the Two Coreys. Some time in 2010 (unsure if the show was still in production) Haim died. I vaguely remember that. Maybe there was a feud between Haim's mom and Feldman. Maybe I even vaguely remember writing about this in my last blog. I don't know why I'm so curious about these two. Haim died of mysterious death, pneumonia. Nobody really dies of pneumonia unless there is something else wrong with them, like they're suuuuuper old or immobile. When a youngish person dies of pneumonia it sort of implies an immunocompromised state, like HIV. These are the things that perk my ears up. 

So Corey is dating this girl named Courtney Anne. And she's Canadian, so he's now asked her to marry him so Trump doesn't deport her. That's what originally got me interested in him. And of course now I feel like an ass. Like he totally was using his engagement as some stunt for a 15 minute bit of  topical humor. And I bit, and wrote up this article about him. Now I'm mad. And I'm ending this. I'm so mad I'm not EVEN going to see how he stands with Taylor Swift. 

Summary: Corey Feldman

Interesting: Decidedly no

Dating: Newly engaged to Courtney Anne

Tay Tay Girl Posse: Very unlikely BUT I'M NOT LOOKING IN TO IT

- Genesis Pulsifer